Happy day

If you followed along with us on that hot summer day, from 5 a.m. until nearly midnight, you know how the journey ended. Happily. It was a long, long day that, despite a few hiccups, was one of the best experiences, as evident on Devin's face. He is an Ironman!

Morning miles

Devin is someone you would call a dreamer. His wants, desires and to-dos are ever-evolving. His wishful hobbies? Endless. These dreams are often big too, hence the Ironman.

I, on the other hand, dream of taking Friday afternoon off work and desire a drink shortly thereafter. Ok, perhaps I have bigger ambitions--but none that can compare to my husband’s. Sadly, he had to help me WANT to dream bigger. I sold myself short a long time ago, content with complacency and my simple yet busy life. I lost the drive to do things I used to enjoy for fun because, as an adult, it seems I now have to make time for them. Some days that’s just too much work.

Devin has a long ride scheduled today. How long? Oh, something like nine hours. No big deal. I haven't decided what my mostly solo day will entail, but darn right it started with coffee. Maybe I'll actually purchase those succulents and cacti I've been eyeing to create a terrarium (that project is only three months overdue), or perhaps I'll start on one of a couple art projects I've been planning for...I don't want to admit how long. See, things get pushed to the back burner. Thanks, adulthood. In reality, I'll probably catch up on neglected laundry and deep clean a room or two in the house. And take a few breaks to watch some HGTV episodes. Ok, let's face it. Deep cleaning even one room is ambitious.

All the while, Devin is out riding with one of his coworker buddies who is also training for his first Ironman. Pretty cool setup, really. How many Ironman-in-training athletes can say they have a resource who is preparing for the same grueling life-goal? So they're going to get some miles in, push each other and gain strength during their training--all things I can't help with during this journey.

In the dating world, one of Devin’s hopes was to find a partner to work out with: someone who shared his athletic ambitions, someone who lived for cycling, someone who thought going for a long run justified an early weekend wake-up hour. He found none of that with me. What a shame, because now he’s stuck... I said, "I do," and he's wearing a ring. Sucker.

I'm not sure what qualities could have possibly made up for my lack of athleticism, but I'm glad he found something else to make up for it. Maybe through my stubborn, anti-running attitude he sees that I just need a little encouragement.

Running buddy in training. Not really.

So this spring, he helped me move my exercise efforts out of the basement and over to the trail around the lake. It's a little over a mile and a half around, over two if the start is in our neighborhood. The first time around involved a lot of walking breaks, especially before the two major inclines on the path. Devin was so patient and supportive. Not long after that, he decided to join me again for his own recovery jog. I had several moments where I wanted to quit running and just walk, but I didn't. I made it all the way around running and set a new personal best time.

My reward for being awesome? Beer and pizza, of course. 

Earned it!

What are leftovers?

No guilt here.

I've managed to make a few more complete rounds on my own since, including this morning. (It had been a while since I put the running shoes on; I only started up again on the treadmill this week.) I put on another pot of coffee and scooted out the door. The lap was painful, but I saw a wonderful message on the path just shy of halfway through, and it made me smile.

Message received.

One day soon, I hope to have enough endurance for a second lap.

Well, laundry calls. Have an amazing weekend, whatever your plans may be.

Chlorine kisses

Lately I’ve been thinking about how exhausting Devin’s undertaking seemed back in January when the real training first began. There have been good days and bad, but we’re so close now. Writing about things sort of fell on the back burner once the weather got warm because our lawn requires a good cutting two to three times a week (talk about a workout) since it’s been raining almost every day lately, and we’ve just had a lot of activities going on in general. I drafted this blog post some time ago and, although it’s old, I just have to share it--maybe significant others of swimmers can relate to this.

***

As sweet as he is, Devin's not the type of guy to send me gifts at work. I'm not one of those girls who gets massive Valentine's Day bouquets or “surprises” on the Hallmark holidays when it's expected that significant others exchange gifts.

And that's ok because he delivers little treats all throughout the year. Like once he surprised me with tickets to Jeff Dunham just hours before the show. Or he made an amazing meal from scratch and paired it with an expensive bottle of wine (more than once, of course). Another time he gifted me a new camera lens and a wedge of Parmigiano Reggiano. So, not the typical "I love you" gifts, but he knows the way to this girl's heart.

What I'm saying is it's the little things that make a relationship awesome. And it's better that they happen when it's least expected or at any time other than when society dictates that it's proper to do so.

Those things didn’t happen much just a few months ago because our lives were pretty much exercise, eat, work, laundry, sleep. Things are much more normal lately, but as this event draws even closer, Devin will refocus on being race-ready. It makes me appreciate the time he is able to dedicate to me--and us--reminding me that he's the best husband and friend I could ask for.

Not always, but often I'm still in bed when Devin gets back from the gym after his swim. If I'm not already awake, having thrown every clothing item within reach and every pillow but my own at the Putz (our cat who believes it's a sin for me to still be in bed once she's awake), then Devin will wake me up with a good morning kiss and the lingering taste and scent of the pool.

I'm not weak in the knees over the exotic experience. I mean, it's chlorine. I get unhappy when I taste it in my drinking water. But in this case, it's a cute little surprise that I don't think about until it happens. Chlorine kisses are just cute.

They're even better when accompanied by a gift. One day, with one eye open, I saw the silhouette of a small object on my pillow. A rare early-morning swimming buddy found its way home with Devin--not exactly something you'd expect to find in the lap pool.

I thought it was fun nonetheless and displayed it on a side table in the living room. It has since vanished, likely hiding under the couch with cat toys, wine corks and all the other unknowns the cats are hoarding.

***

One night, having gone to bed within some unreasonable 6:00 hour, I was, as always, struggling to fall asleep. I welcomed Cheff, our other cat to cuddle and purr me to sleep. It didn't work. He got tired of my restlessness and sought a more peaceful place to lounge for the evening. I turned toward Devin, closed my eyes and inhaled deeply to hopefully coax my less-than-tired self into relaxation. Instead, my eyes popped open. *sniff sniff* I leaned in closer to Devin's shoulder. *sniff sniff* No way.

Are you kidding me? After a post-swim run, showering that morning and working all day, the man still lightly smelled of chlorine.

Please, hold yourselves back, ladies. Can you believe I have less than a month left to experience this eau de pool man-scent? Then it’s time for him to hit the open water!

Less than a month. Less than a month...

It was great while it lasted

We took a bit of a timeout for a couple months. It was refreshing, yet probably a touch detrimental. Devin backed down his training and spent some time with me. We went out, got to enjoy evening Scotch and fire pit sessions with friends and neighbors, had movie nights and generally enjoyed being outdoors after a chilly winter.

It felt like I had my husband back, like things were the way they should be once again. Morning workouts had shifted to evening, but they were few. So, although I was having a great time, I was helping him revert back to our previous lifestyle, which isn't going to help him complete this goal he's been working so hard to achieve.

It's so hard to flip that switch, but we returned to structure--just a bit looser. One night we went to bed at 8, in the 7 o'clock hour the next, and he was able to readjust to getting up in the mornings for a swim or run so he could come home and get a decent bike ride in after work. He even rode his bike to and from work one day last week (almost a 70-mile round trip), something he hasn't done in quite some time.

It's now Sunday morning. After sending Devin off on an early ride before the wind picks up, I'm enjoying a great cup of coffee while listening to the birds and the neighbor's sprinklers. Ah, spring. Today is all about the distance. His planned route is over 100 miles, and that will help him plan for the big day--when that kind of ride will be followed by a full marathon. Sounds painful. I'm glad he has to do it, not me.

The break from structured training had an effect on me too: I had forgotten how quickly the closet clears out and much laundry builds up with this amount of exercise. Somehow the empty hangers were not a red flag. It doesn't help that the morning low temperatures have dropped back into the 30s lately. That requires extra layers during those early-morning rides. Hopefully that heavy hamper has cured me of letting too much pile up.

Speaking of that, as comfortable as this chair and a purring cat on my lap is, I better start another round of laundry and get to mowing the lawn so I can spend what's left of the weekend with Devin when he returns in a few hours. Can that serve as my workout for the day?

Just checking in

As I mentioned last time, this whole Ironman preparation has done wonders for Devin. There have been ups and downs along the way, but we're getting so close now, it seems--just four months away.

Last week was a rest week, and it was nice to actually feel normal again. We went out, stayed up a little later, slept in a little longer and just enjoyed life. We even had some impromptu date outings, which were refreshing. And there was wine involved. Can't beat that.

Now the monster schedule has returned, but there's a new shift in the hours we're awake. Warmer days are more promising, and Devin's been taking advantage of outdoor workouts whenever he can, even after work rather than squeezing everything in early in the morning. I can't blame him; I've seen it on his face--the complete agony of being stuck on a trainer in the basement for two to three hours. We'll just leave it at: that is not the preferred way to ride.

But I prefer it because I know he's safe. Although a smooth shoulder along the highway is one of the most refreshing moments for a cyclist after a long winter, watching him coast down the street as he sets out for the open road begins my day's most painful hours.

I'm not always a glass-half-full kind of girl--I'm actually a bit of a worry wart (thanks, Mom). So, I find myself incessantly grabbing my phone to check his location on GPS, just to have a general idea of his route (if he hadn't already told me) and to make sure he's made progress since the last time I looked. Does this make me slightly stalker-ish? Obsessive? Yeah, probably. Thanks to my inherited inability to just chill, the only way I can take my mind off of it is to distract myself with laundry or shopping or a beer. Sometimes a whole hour goes by. Then I gasp with panic and dive for my phone, because I feel like not having maintained knowledge of his whereabouts makes me a bad wife or something. Seriously. There must be something wrong with me. Maybe I just need additional beer to distract me a bit longer.

We know so many cyclists locally and throughout Nebraska. I wonder if their significant others and families feel the same way I do. Maybe they did at first and are more at ease after so many years. Maybe they're just better at keeping their emotions in check.

My fears revved up in recent weeks when a local cyclist was hit head on and killed in the middle of the day west of the city. I took an afternoon break to check local news, and it was everywhere. The location sounded familiar, along a major highway, so I mapped it. My jaw dropped. The accident happened along one of Devin's more common ride routes. It made me sick.

Experienced athletes dress to be seen when in high-traffic areas, but no amount of bright clothing, reflective gear or flashing lights can help you when you're up against a vehicle. When Devin went out for rides in the following days, I found myself thinking those horrible "what if" thoughts, making it even harder to put myself at ease until I heard him coming back through the door.

He did something for himself, and I suppose his family and me, last week. He finally got a Road ID.

Since he doesn't carry his wallet or any sort of identification when he's out on a ride, this allows him to wear a band on his wrist that displays his name and phone numbers of people to contact in an emergency. It's just a little piece of mind that, should an accident happen, first responders can know his name and who to call.

I'm still going to look him up no mater what, but I'm just going to chalk it up to practicing for the big day when he'll be swimming, biking, running for 10-plus hours.

Fruitful efforts

With increased activity and a healthy diet comes results. That's exactly what my husband is getting in just over a month of training and monitoring food intake. He looks healthier, and he's happier. Ultimately, that makes me happy.

The biggest thing I've learned over the last couple weeks is that we go through a lot of coffee, eggs, fruit and yogurt. As if we weren't regulars at the store already, I stop almost daily to replenish some items that were still well-stocked the day before. Example: Last night we had a conversation about the increased fruit consumption. Then I noticed that the two bunches of bananas I had grabbed over my lunch break the day before were completely gone, except for one lone nanner. WHAT? Going back through our food logs, I had indeed consumed some of the purchase. Two. I ate two. Devin downed the rest. I don't think we properly budgeted for this.

Apples and oranges are also regulars in the fruit bowl. I even bought some pears because they're my favorite. Wouldn't you know it: Those suckers have the highest calorie count out of the fruit we regularly purchase. Of course they do. Because I love them. Sigh.

Did you catch that? Yeah, I've been counting calories. Eww. But don't worry—it's only a temporary thing. Although I've been pretty conscious of staying under my daily budget most days, there's no way I could do this for life. I really don't like having to think about how many calories are in this many almonds or in that much soup before I eat. It's too restrictive. When I get into an exercise routine I can actually maintain and get to my goal weight (I'm already down more than five pounds—take that, holidays!), I will return to eating things because they're good and because I want to. So there.

My workouts have been a bit spotty this week, but this morning, while Devin was riding on the trainer next to me (yep, I got a witness!), I actually ran a whole mile and a half with no walking breaks in between. Ok, perhaps it was more of a jog because I can't maintain that distance at higher speeds yet. No! You know what? It was a RUN...even though I feel awkward while running. I've been saying for years that these long legs of mine aren't an asset of speed, so all you zombie apocalypse people, fear not—I will be the sacrifice while you get away safely. And that's ok because today I ran that 1.5.

Devin swam, rode the bike AND ran today. It's impressive really. He has to swim more than two miles in open water this summer, and his biggest improvement lately is in the pool, which is comforting for me because he's least experienced in that area. He's becoming a more efficient swimmer, covering more distance in less time and achieving good form. He's pretty much beaming with confidence, and that's awesome because we have a long way to go.

Over the last month, I’ve received a lot of mixed feelings over Devin’s undertaking. Some people are proud of him, knowing the commitment involved. Some are cheering me to help him keep focused. Some think he’s crazy—for changing his life, for even wanting to do something like this. Some think I’m crazy for trying to adopt his schedule—going to bed at 6 or 7 with him and then getting up two to three hours earlier than I was before—because I certainly didn’t sign up for this event.

No, I didn’t. I could just do my own thing and never worry about how he’s improving or struggling. I could go back to my lethargic and unhealthy ways. I could interact with him for only about two hours a day (optimistically), but what kind of a marriage is that?

It’s not even required of me, but if I was in my husband’s shoes, I couldn’t imagine going through this alone. I like to think having my support is a little extra encouragement when the workouts gain intensity or volume or if at any point the commitment becomes overwhelming.

I will get angry at times. I will regret not going out with a friend every time I’m asked. I will refuse to get up earlier than 6 a.m. some days. But I won’t leave his side. I have far too much respect and love for him.

Just as much as he needs to know I have his back, I need a support system too. I don’t know anyone who can relate to this specifically, but I'm certain that eventually I'll have a selfish, weak, this-is-so-unfair-to-me moment, and I'll need a friend. I hope someone can be there for me too.

Some steps in the right direction

This past week has been rough. I had a couple late nights, either trying to catch up on dishes and laundry or doing high school reunion planning, and I was completely unable to wake up in the morning. One of the days, I didn't even hear the 3 a.m. alarm. That never happens; I'm such a light sleeper. It was probably that same morning that Devin had gone to the gym to swim for an hour, had already returned and was in the middle of his hour-long run before I even woke up. Putz, one of our cats, turned on the faucet in the bathroom, and that was enough to break my slumber...at almost 6. Since my chance at treadmill time was limited, I succumbed to the much more appealing coffee maker instead.

Then after work, all I wanted to do was make my dinner and sit with the cats, but guilt got the best of me. I did some time on the treadmill each of those nights to make up for missing morning activity. I think I ran a whole mile during one of those sessions.

***

My work is promoting a new wellness project to start the year off right. Since it wasn't required for insurance purposes this year, I promptly deleted the email. A week later, a coworker stopped in the doorway, asking us if we were signing up for EveryMove, a social fitness tracker. The more people in the company who sign up, adds to the value of a gift that one lucky person will receive later--the largest being an Apple iPad. I thought, since I'm sort of doing stuff anyway, why not track it? Yeah, I gave in. Joining the challenge earned one entry, and active days recorded throughout the challenge earn additional entries. Out of the almost 200 people who have so far signed up, I'd say my chances at the big prize, whatever it will be, aren't great. So, EveryMove helps me work toward personal rewards also, like discounts on jewelry, sports gear or food. I chose wine. Imagine that.

The points I earn toward my wine are based on the activities I do throughout the day and their duration. I can also earn points for the number of steps I take throughout the day. One of the work perks for signing up was a hugely discounted Fitbit Zip, which tracks steps, mileage and calories burned.

Steps

Distance

It syncs with my phone or EveryMove easily, helping me earn active day points, some of which I can share with the coworkers I've friended. I guess it's a bit of encouragement to get extra activity in when I see one of my coworkers put in more time than I did. If only I get in 700 more steps... That only goes so far though, especially since I probably go to bed 3-4 hours before most of them. I am, however, usually the first one to post in the activity feed when I do my time in the 4 o'clock hour.

What do I like best about my Fitbit? Probably the smileys. They change throughout the day, getting happier with the more steps taken. It's the little things.

I can even sync EveryMove with apps like Strava, which I discovered I hadn't used since last June. Ouch. Like I need another illustration of my chronic inactivity. Devin and I have gone on walks the past couple days, and when it's chilly like it has been, we move rather briskly.

My Fitbit also reminds me of how little I move at work. Ever since we had a new system implemented late last year, I rarely leave my desk. Like, I have to make a huge effort to break 3,000 steps. It's unfortunate, really. So, most of my steps happen at home, either on the treadmill or just doing regular housework. I'll take it.

Oh, how I wish I could just let Devin take it along on his workouts. I'd be sipping that wine in no time...

Speaking of Devin, he's doing really well with his training lately, despite some back issues. He's in good hands though and taking steps toward repairing the problem. And I know the exercise is working because I can see it in his face. He's already dropped a healthy amount of weight, and definition is coming back to those cyclist's legs. Not quite sure that makes up for going to bed at 6:00 last night. I'm still disgruntled about that. No one wants that on a Saturday night. It didn't help me want to wake up any earlier either. Devin is still offering to help with the reprogramming. We'll see if I take him up on that. For now, I'll just be the one to brew an extra pot of coffee.

Early to bed, early to rise

It's before 7 p.m. I should go to bed, but I know if I do I'll only stare at the ceiling for a good 45 minutes to an hour. That's if I'm lucky. I just know I'll still see 9:00.

My husband came home, opened his mail, talked to me for a bit while I was still sautéing some veggies for my dinner, checked his phone, set the alarm for 3 a.m. and got ready for bed.

I won't be able to wake up with him because I'm still awake now.

This new lifestyle is already challenging, and it honestly hasn't truly begun. It's so hard to reprogram myself when a) bedtime was anywhere from 10 p.m.-12 a.m. and b) I am NOT a morning person--I will maim anyone blocking the path to the coffee maker.

Mornings are our time together now, and I'm not entirely on board yet. After Devin's workouts for the day, he does make me a hot breakfast, so that's something to look forward to. Sure beats grabbing a granola bar before flying out the door.

This morning I DID have to pry myself out of bed before 4 because Devin was only going to the gym for a swim; he would do the run on our treadmill at home. So, in an effort to complete 1.5 miles before he came home, I managed to challenge myself today.

**Side note: I am not a runner. My mom has always compared my efforts to that of a turtle. It's not far from the truth.**

After warming up a bit at 3 mph and doing a brisk walk at 4-4.5 mph for several minutes, I turned the speed up to 5-5.5 and somehow, through the panting and feelings of desperation, I kept that pace for an entire half mile in just under 6 minutes.

Please stop laughing now.

It hurt. I was dizzy. I cooled down, finished up the last few minutes to hit my 1.5 mile goal for the day and crawled upstairs toward the coffee that I had set to brew earlier. I was cleaned up, dressed, browsing social media and on my second cup before Devin walked in the door. And then he ran for probably an hour. Talk about a natural...showoff.

Other than breakfast, getting-ready time is really the only reward I can so far identify in this journey. Even if I don't get up until 4:30 or 5, I can still allot myself more time in the morning than I had been doing.

One thing's for sure: I'm still not a morning person, no matter how good the breakfast is.

Do I call?

“I want to do an Ironman.”

I don’t remember the details or the moment he said those words, but I remember it happened. Let me try to put myself back in that day. He looked me straight in the eye and basically asked my permission to do something he’s been dreaming to achieve. An item on his bucket list. But an Ironman? Really?

A lot of husbands might approach a request to their wives with, “Hey, fixing that car just might not be worth it; I already have a new one in mind,” or “So, a new grill would be great this summer…” But, no, not mine. He wants to suffer. What’s more, he’s going to take me down with him. I just know it!

This was last July. We have since nested in our new home, married and hosted our first Christmas. Now that 2014 is here, the test has come. Can I possibly support this? I said I would, no matter what. I’m only now beginning to understand the sacrifices I will have to make along the way over the next 28 weeks while he trains. Devin is already doing some work to prepare for the structured regimen he intends to follow.

The competition will be an inaugural event in Boulder, Colorado, this August. That’s not far away. We’ve been to Colorado once before, and I enjoyed it, but this time, on race day, I will be alone for about half the day. Watching. Waiting. Wondering. Maybe shopping (don’t judge me). I’ve seen him compete in triathlons and other races before, but nothing this extreme. I’m concerned, yet I’m proud to know someone who is brave enough and disciplined enough to take on such a training plan and grueling journey that will take him through Colorado waters and roads to a finish line that few get to cross.

It’s nice to have a light at the end of this tunnel, and there’s talk of spending some extra time near the mountains as sort of a getaway. Every “vacation” we’ve taken has been rushed over a weekend, usually combined with a holiday to allot that extra day of travel. But we’ve never gone away together for an extended amount of time that required any time off work. Not even a honeymoon yet.

For now, I don’t know how this is going to work. I don’t know how hard it will be for him. I don’t know how hard it will be for me. He's all in. Will I be able to support him, or will the required energy and sacrifices along the way prove too much?